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Love me or hate me, both are in my favor. If you love me, I'll always be in your heart. If you hate me, I'll always be in your mind.
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That painful moment when the roof of your mouth gets stabbed by a Dorito.
That awkward moment when your at a toy store, pressing the 'TRY ME' button on a toy and it wont stop...So you just awkwardly walk away like nothing happened.
Money doesn't buy happiness, but I would rather cry in a Lamborghini than a Ford.
That awkward moment when you're in the car and you look at the people in the car next to you. Then you realize they're already looking at you.
I think that school and microwave minutes are longer than regular minutes.
Always pee louder than the person next to you to assert dominance.
My mother texted me 'What does IDK, LY & TTYL mean?' I answered: 'I dont know, love u, talk to u later.' Mother: 'Ok, I'll ask your sister'
I will not be impressed with technology until I can download food from the internet.
I probably could stand a chance on American Idol if I could bring my shower on stage.